I’m just going to bitch for a bit, because I have been so quiet lately (large joke). My transfer isn’t going to be until February. Feb-FUCKING-ruary. In the grand scheme of things, it’s not that much more time to wait. And if it works, that means I’ll be hugely, uncomfortably pregnant in the winter, safely avoiding the blistering summers here in the South. That’s another good thing, as I don’t handle hot well. Why the delay, you ask? Because I apparently can’t fucking count. That’s why.

The donor we picked has donated before. I was told she wasn’t taking birth control pills. I found out I wasn’t properly informed, therefore that’s one month (November) to wait for a regular cycle. Then we do the Clomid challenge (December), because it’s apparently been long enough that my apparently VERY conservative clinic wants to reconfirm there’s not going to be a problem with her. Again, that’s not a bad thing. We want things to go well, yes? What I didn’t figure on was the ADDITIONAL month (January) for her to be totally off any stims before game day. Hence, the retrieval will be in February, not January as I’d hoped.

I……..can’t think of a good cuss word to put here. None of them seem to appropriately convey my level of pissed-offedness.

This is nobody’s fault, it’s not really even mine. We picked a donor we liked after sifting through tons of them, and this one looks like she’s going to be a good one. Of course, by “good” I mean that the agency can contact her and get an answer whenever they try, and she turned in all her paperwork. Perhaps I’m reading (hoping) too much into the basics of this business, but I guess you have to start somewhere……

There is absolutely nothing I can do about this, except shut up and wait. At least we have a plan. At least we found a donor. At least we were able to scratch together the money to try one more time. I have a lot of positive things to focus on. I’m just not able to give a rat’s ass about them today.

It’s just one of those days when I can only see turds in the punchbowl, I guess. I think I’ll do things tonight I can’t do if I’m pregnant. Like take a bath while eating sushi, smoking and drinking champagne out of the bottle……maybe work in a little meth while I’m at it.

Just can’t see the bright side of things right now – maybe later….

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