So, I wrote a letter to our egg donor today. It was so much harder to write than I thought it would be. I don’t write easily, and especially not about difficult, painful, loaded subjects like infertility. I guess I’ve learned to guard all those emotions very carefully – and it’s really hard to put them down on paper after so long. But I wanted to somehow let her know that we knew and appreciated her sacrifice of her time, her body, and her sanity (depending on how she reacted to all the druuuugzzzzzzz). I told her I didn’t know how to thank her enough, that I hope she was doing okay with all the procedures and needles and ultrasounds and drugs. I told her how we picked her – that after our few criteria, it boiled down to the fact that we could tell from her profile that we would like her as a person, and would consider ourselves lucky to call someone like her a friend. I told her I wished I could give her a hug, and that we wished all the best for her during this journey and afterward. I didn’t tell her that she has given me the gift of hope, something I’ve lost somewhere along the way, because I’m still not ready to trot that all the way out there in case it doesn’t work. I’ll keep that to myself for now, and enjoy the world with new eyes for a while…….

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